Thursday, February 17, 2005
Funny Business
As promised, today's update is about the funniest things in the world. I will list the Top 4 funniest things in the world, because (A) I'm a lazy writer and lists are really easy to do and (B) any more than 4 and even I would lose interest.
DISCLAIMER: This is just my opinion of what the funniest things in the world are, of course, and I respect the fact that others may possess a different sense of humor than my own. Those people can go suck eggs and read a different website.
And so, without further ado, here we go:
#4: Belching and farting. I may be 33 years old, but I swear if bodily noises ever stop being funny to me, I'm going to go have a nice lie down on the nearest train tracks.
#3: Snoop Dogg. This guy just cracks me up. He doesn't even have to do anything. Just show me Snoop Dogg sitting in a chair drinking an Iced Tea, and I'm in hysterics.
#2: People other than myself getting hit in the crotch. I know I'm not alone in this. "America's Funniest Home Videos" has been on television for something like 72 years, and the show's producers can point to one thing being responsible for their enduring success: Toddlers with wiffle-ball bats hitting their fathers in the balls.
#1: Monkeys. Put a monkey into almost any scenario and you have instant laughter. Monkeys=Comedy Gold. Interestingly enough, the only thing you could have a monkey do that would NOT be funny is to hit a guy in the groin with a blunt object. You would be inclined to think that combining the funniest 2 things in the world would lead to an even higher level of comedy, but monkeys attacking humans, even in the crotch, would just be the beginning of a terrifying scenario that would ultimately lead to the near-destruction of all mankind, leaving only a handful of survivors to begin a hopeless rebellion against our simian oppressors, which in turn would lead to Charlton Heston crying on a beach somewhere. EXCEPTION: If the person on the receiving end of the monkey's scrotal assault was George W. Bush, then it would be funny.
Feel free to put your own 2 cents in on what you think is funny!
DISCLAIMER: This is just my opinion of what the funniest things in the world are, of course, and I respect the fact that others may possess a different sense of humor than my own. Those people can go suck eggs and read a different website.
And so, without further ado, here we go:
#4: Belching and farting. I may be 33 years old, but I swear if bodily noises ever stop being funny to me, I'm going to go have a nice lie down on the nearest train tracks.
#3: Snoop Dogg. This guy just cracks me up. He doesn't even have to do anything. Just show me Snoop Dogg sitting in a chair drinking an Iced Tea, and I'm in hysterics.
#2: People other than myself getting hit in the crotch. I know I'm not alone in this. "America's Funniest Home Videos" has been on television for something like 72 years, and the show's producers can point to one thing being responsible for their enduring success: Toddlers with wiffle-ball bats hitting their fathers in the balls.
#1: Monkeys. Put a monkey into almost any scenario and you have instant laughter. Monkeys=Comedy Gold. Interestingly enough, the only thing you could have a monkey do that would NOT be funny is to hit a guy in the groin with a blunt object. You would be inclined to think that combining the funniest 2 things in the world would lead to an even higher level of comedy, but monkeys attacking humans, even in the crotch, would just be the beginning of a terrifying scenario that would ultimately lead to the near-destruction of all mankind, leaving only a handful of survivors to begin a hopeless rebellion against our simian oppressors, which in turn would lead to Charlton Heston crying on a beach somewhere. EXCEPTION: If the person on the receiving end of the monkey's scrotal assault was George W. Bush, then it would be funny.
Feel free to put your own 2 cents in on what you think is funny!
